Mental Health

It's Saturday afternoon again. This week was the same as the last. Another finish line crossed. Another week in Japan, completed successfully. But this Saturday is a bit different than the last one. Today I do not feel the need to lock my door and hide from everyone. I wonder why?

Before I came here, everyone told me that not all my days here would be rosy. They were right of course and I expected it to be so. There is stress and isolation, frustration and confusion mixed in with all the friendships and generosity, achievements and zen in Japan. There is no doubt, in the end, this will have been a life changing experience. Do I rue coming here? Not a chance. But I did have great expectations of myself. One was to be a good Ambassador. "Keep my shit wired down tight." as it was once put to me. I think I've done a good job......mostly. But just as honest men have a short life in politics, my 'vocal' self makes repressenting here a bit tough. Truth be told though, I don't mind. I'd rather be happy than popular. True of me I think for my whole life. And the truth does set you free.

It was however not last weeks post alone that has provided me with this sense of inner calm. My mom called me in Japan to tell me that maybe some of the things I said last week were not the best things to say. Of course she is right, I would never admit it though. I defend what I said. I make no apologies. It's my right to be a jackass if I want to. But being able to vent over the phone to someone who knows me well has reminded me of what makes me happy in life. It's being honest. To thine ownself to true, I think Shakespeare once wrote. Well, this is me.

My apologies to readers who don't like it when I use foul language, but if you read blogs regularily like I do, you know it's just part of the blogging culture.

Thanks for calling this week, Mom.